8a.m. Time for school. I get to listen to the great philosophers at school. The great knowledge they have bestowed upon me. OR! I could sign into Facebook and be moved by the vast amount of philosophical quotes that have been bounced through an echo chamber from boring websites that produce list after list of worthless sayings.

Stop right there! I am guilty many times over for doing this exact procedure. I AM AN IDIOT! I wanted to get that out of the way before I am labeled a hypocrite. Now, onto the show. My first question is

What is the point of posting a status update by saying something like:

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. “
Lao Tzu

First off, if this was my status update, I would leave off the original author. I mean, come on, I want people to believe I’m deep. I came up with this quote while sitting watching Survivor. I have layer upon layer of knowledge. I’m mysterious. My past relationships have molded me to be in touch with my heart.

I know we all have had our ups and downs in relationships, but let’s be serious for a moment. You are not that deep. Maybe, but probably not. You want people to think you are for your own self gratification. This is the part I’m trying to figure out. I want to know what deep down brings people to showcase their “emotions” through empty Facebook statuses. To be honest, I want to know why use “status updates” to tell everyone what’s going on in our lives. That’s an entire other blog (book) really. Just on the psychology behind Facebook and the tribe of 300 million it has created.

THIS IS NOT BIGOTRY, THIS IS NOT HYPOCRISY, I’VE ALREADY CALLED MYSELF AN IDIOT FOR DOING SUCH THINGS

Now, let’s examine the above selected text. CLASS! FOLLOW ALONG! Kidding.  But seriously, take a look. What is this person trying to say about themselves? If they are single, what do you think a person interested in them is thinking? I would be intimidated about approaching someone with this status. It says to me that they don’t need/ nor want anyone in their life. Now, this is definitely overanalyzing a simple status update, but everyone is a Facebook stalker! Let’s throw that out right now. If you like someone, what is the first thing you do? You get on GOD DAMN Facebook and do a stalk of their profile. What type of music are they into? Movies?  What about their status? “Oh shit, this girl is kinda crazy about relationships. I will hold off on asking her out.” As deeply moving as YOU may think this quote is, YOU could be sending off the vibes that will leave you exactly as you say, I N D E P E N D E N T.

This post isn’t over just yet. I want people to understand their audience when they post ridiculous status updates. This isn’t just about philosophical quotes, but everything you do on the web. Anybody can read it. You might not think much of it when you originally post it, but like I have mentioned previously, someone is probably reading it.  Then ask yourself “who am I trying to impress?” If you need a Facebook status to do so or a blog entry to suffice your darkened thought, then maybe you should keep it to yourself. I am guilty of this from a drunken blog post from Saturday night that can be found here.

Just kidding, I’ve learned my lesson ~Thanks Robyn ; )

This isn’t a degradation to Facebook users,(well kinda) but to those who have made it the most important part of their day. I know it’s interesting to find out what everyone is doing at all times, it feeds our narcissistic pleasures, but let’s start doing something productive. To end, don’t post sappy Facebook updates and not expect people to make fun. It’s what us as humans do to feed our own self loathing (think Jr. High all over again). We feel good shitting on others. Yes that is some self actualization that people need to figure out, but until then, we will keep doing it.

Now let’s go play Farmville